I was one of them, back in my early twenties.

I had just quit a job in an employment agency after four-and-a-half very long, very stressful days.

Confined for eight hours a day to an incredibly tiny cubicle, ear pressed to the phone calling through the yellow pages trying to find job listings, then on my very first interview having to lie to a girl about a fictitious job the boss had advertised to pull in applicants. (Can you say bait-and-switch?)

That girl knew I was lying, and when she walked out the door, I walked out, too, almost on her heels.

So when I started a new job selling door-to-door, it seemed like heaven in comparison. No cubical – I was outdoors in the June sunshine and balmy breezes. No telephone – I was talking to people face to face.

And no lying. If I didn’t think a product measured up, I simply didn’t put it in my case; I only showed what I thought was the best.

I was ecstatic from the first minute of the first day.

Every house I walked up to, my heart sang and I said over and over to myself, “I am SO-O-O-O-O-O glad to be out here and not trapped in that cubical.”

I was deliriously happy to be where I was. Overjoyed to be doing what I was doing.

And sell? Man, I sold just about half of all the people I talked to. Back in the early sixties, a hundred-dollar-day was the holy grail of Fuller Brush men. Sales people would stay out till eight or nine o’clock every night trying to nail that hundred dollar mark.

But not me. I knocked off every afternoon about five or five-thirty with $120 or $130 worth of receipts in my order book.

Then, after a few weeks, something quietly changed. My sales began to sag. Each morning saw me going out a little less enthusiastic. I spent increasing amounts of time trying to figure out what was going wrong.

After a few months, I left that job, utterly disappointed in myself.

Afterwards I wondered how I could have taken something so obviously perfect for me and messed it up so badly.

In fact, that question followed me, haunted me for twenty long years. Eventually, though, I figured it out.

The secret had been right in front of my nose all those years, but just as a fish can’t see the water it swims in, I had been unable to repeat that undeniable success.

My big secret? It was simple, really.

I had filled my mind with thankfulness – undiluted gratitude – unreserved joy at being right where I was, doing exactly what I was doing.

Then, twenty years later, when I started being thankful again – but deliberately, this time – my life changed back.

Suddenly, all sorts of “serendipitous” things started occurring. People I barely knew started bringing me terrific opportunities.

Mark this: Joyous stuff started happening AFTER I went back to being overjoyed with my life.

Make no mistake – there were still challenges that needed to be dealt with. But I stopped seeing “problems” as personal affronts deliberately sent by life to impede me. In fact, with the right mindset, I couldn’t see problems at all. Instead, they looked like fascinating puzzles to solve and games to enjoy sorting out.

And even now, anytime I feel life becoming a bit too stressful, a bit too heavy, a bit less fun, I make myself stop and – against all logic – I start looking at all the stuff around me and calling it good.

And yes, I even make myself say, “I am SO-O-O-O-O glad to be right here, right now.” And I don’t stop saying that until I can feel it taking hold.

Now, I realize that on the surface, there is absolutely no logic to this practice… except for one tiny thing.

It works.

So if you decide to try this approach, do this: make a list of all your major problems and start through them, one at a time, saying, “I am so glad this is happening. This is actually very interesting now that I look at it closely, and I’m lucky to be here so I can gain some great new knowledge from this. I am SO-O-O-O-O glad.”

Warning: you’ve got to put some real oomph into it. Some real feeling. Just saying the words without working up some enthusiasm is like writing a letter without a pen in your hand. You’re going through all the motions, but no communication takes place.

So do that, and keep doing it till it starts taking hold.

How can you tell when it’s taking hold?

There are two signs. First, you begin to lose that tense, blocked, frustrated feeling. And second, your life starts working FOR you instead of AGAINST you. Lots of little things start going right instead of wrong. People begin treating you like you’ve always wanted them to.

And you go to bed each night feeling like you’ve just had a wonderful day.

If you’ve tried and tried all the logical stuff and your life is still a mess, try being illogical. Try being thankful for everything you’ve got.

Including the mess.

And you’ll find, just as I have, that indeed there is a miracle in every mess.

It’s not critical for the employees to like the boss, but they have to trust him or her. If not, he won’t be able to lead them and the workers will have little motivation at work.

Truth and trust are connected together. You could be honest for years but one lie can destroy the trust you have built all this time and there is no doubt that regaining that trust is very difficult.

You have to be honest. Do not say “I don’t know” when you know. Be straight and say exactly what you have in mind. When you say “No” mean it. We have to realize that the work place is not a popularity contest . Tasks need to be completed and work’s goals should be accomplished with success.

Therefore, trying to be pleasant all the time will build obstacles to your job and disorientate you from your real goals at work.

Open your ears and accept criticism from employees or colleagues. It’s hard for every person to accept comments especially negative but in order to lead you will have to. Always listen to other ideas, suggestions and encourage open discussions. That doesn’t mean, in case you are the manager that you don’t decide according to your facts.

Demonstrate the trust. Just saying “I trust you” is not enough. You have to show it by assigning responsibilities and providing all the tools they need in order to succeed in the tasks you assign to them. When we say tools we mean training, information e.t.c

Recognize the well done job. People need to be appreciated especially at work. When an employee is productive, and finishes the assignment successfully show your appreciation directly. People need the approval to be in public and the negative comments in private. It’s in human nature, we can’t change it, and so it is important to follow that rule.

Recent research analyzes that workers do not care only about the money. They want to be educated at work, to take initiatives and also play a part in resolving problems that occur.

To sum it up, you have to do what you preach, and be clear with your actions. When you say “No” or “Yes” mean them, and of course you have to give the example. If you enforce a rule at your company but you are the only one who breaks it, don’t expect the rule to last for long. Especially the trust will vanish, and leading your team will become extremely difficult task.

That’s what it boils down to, you know…courage. Well, I know that’s the case for me anyway. I have taken to examining myself at such times when I find it difficult to decide what best to do. My discovery is that, even when it is abundantly clear that one action is for the greater good, fear stops me from acting of my own will. I look at the “possible” consequences and I can’t bear to move forward. What about the other action? Well, the fallout of that might also be unbearable, so I don’t take that action either. I can’t stay where I am. I must do one of the other. Repeatedly I return back to the same fork in the road, and I don’t act on either one, hoping that the next time I return there would be more clarity. Sadly, clarity hardly comes. Eventually, when I do act, a lot more damage has been done than was necessary…damage that could have been avoided if I only had the courage to act sooner.

Well, more damage isn’t always done, one could argue. It’s true. Still, at the very least, you take away your control of the situation by becoming a victim. Surely that’s wrong, you say. What if you rush into a decision that you later come to regret? Wouldn’t it be better to consider things fully before you do something stupid? Once again, that’s correct. However, for most people, the consideration goes on for way longer than it should. If there is something else that should happen first, then that’s fine; but this is not the case either, for most people. It’s just that they don’t want to do what is necessary.

Making decisions is a key activity in taking control of your life. It’s a skill in itself. Some people seem to have the ability to do it better than others. For these people, it seems to be an innate ability. For others, well it requires development. You have to practice. You have to flex those “decision-making” muscles. You can’t afford to wait around for things to happen. You have to confront your fear…fear of failure and of missed opportunities.

In order to develop the ability to act when the situation demands it, it’s ironic that the best ally is a more “passive” resource. It’s acceptance. When you can learn to accept life, then you are able to do more without being paralyzed by fear. Think about it. You can’t control everything. This is a fact. You can’t see the future (unless you are psychic or something, in which case skip this); another fact. You will make mistakes in life; but you can recover and move on. Accept all of this and you’re well on your way to being able to make tough decisions.

Acceptance is not so difficult. You do it all the time. Do you drive? Well, if you do, you have to take it for granted that the driver coming from the opposite direction is not a lunatic who is going to run into you. If you’ve ever crossed the street at a Traffic Light, or gotten in a car with someone else driving, then you’re doing a lot of accepting. How do you do it? Well, you don’t have a choice. You have to get to where you’re going. You wouldn’t get there if you refuse to get in a car because you are afraid you might crash. It’s a risk you have to take because you are convinced that it there is almost no choice. Well, how about applying that acceptance to your decision? There are no guarantees in life (generally speaking). You might have made a mistake, but at least you had the courage to choose. And who’s to say you wouldn’t have gotten struck by lightning if you had taken the other path. You just can’t know that it would have been better if you hadn’t acted as you did. Accept this as well. It will give you confidence. Trust me, with confidence; you are already half-way to your destination.

So step up to the plate. Choose. Don’t be a victim of circumstance. You can do so much more knowing that you are responsible for the choices that have delivered you to where you are in life.

Starting with a baseline is about honestly figuring out where you are and what you are doing so that you know exactly what needs to be changed. It may sound odd, but many of us are unaware of what we do. When my clients tell me they want to lose weight the first thing I do is have them keep a food journal for a week just to get a baseline. The next week they share how shocked they were to see not only how much they were eating, but also what they were eating. Many of us are on autopilot and we simply are not aware of what we are doing. When you track it – and this works with anything – you have a real picture of where you are and what needs to change.

I read a statistic once that said most people consistently spend about 10% more than they make. I believe that is true, and it is because what is being spent, especially on a credit card, is not tracked. I once had a client that just didn’t have enough time to accomplish everything she needed to do. When she tracked her time for a week she was made painfully aware that she was spending hours in front of the television. The first step in change is awareness. You have to become aware of what you are doing and exactly where you are before you can proceed forward. Keeping track for a week or two will provide you with valuable information that will support your change effort.

Before you embark on any type of change effort you have to know where you are. I liken it to those travel maps that have an X printed next to “You are here.” Until you are aware of exactly where you are – and many of us don’t have a clue – it will be impossible to make the needed change.

The first step in your change effort is to determine where you are. Keep a log for a week or two. This will give you a realistic idea of what you are doing. You can track anything from how much money you spend to how many hours of sleep you get. Once you know the truth about where you are you can proceed.

There are times when listening to your ‘gut’ comes in handy, but for the most part, what is perceived as a gut reaction is simply fear of failure or rejection before the event even takes place. How can you squelch your inner critic so that you can move on and build the business that you dream of?

According to Jennie England’s article ‘Make Friends With Your Inner Critic’ from the direct sales resource ‘Build It Big’, there are steps you can take to transform your critic. First, listen to your inner voice and make a list of what you hear, elaborating on how you feel about each. Ms.England says that you should choose a response to what your critic tells you, and make a choice to ignore the negative. Remember to reaffirm your best qualities daily and you will ‘reprogram’ yourself to take your critic’s suggestions as positive messages rather than constant negatives. (Build It Big. http://mydswa.org)

There is a concept that is finding a huge following with work at home moms or women who simply desire to create a positive life of abundance. Although this idea is in no way new, the Law of Attraction is changing the lives of people in amazing ways. Whether you’re a religious person or not, the basics are simple, you attract what you think. This theory too is another direction to follow for achieving your dreams and not allowing negativity to lead your life.

Choosing to challenge your ‘little voices’ and change your negative thinking will have an impact on every aspect of your life, creating positive habits that even your worst inner critic can’t bring down.

His captors were so impressed with his strength that they sold him to the Roman navy as a rower for their warships. Again Ben-Hur refused to give up. He used his great strength to become the best rower on the boat. Eventually, he was given the special privilege of not being chained to the boat.

Later in a great naval battle, his boat was rammed and sunk. Because Ben-Hur was not chained, he was the only slave to escape. He was able to save the admiral who had given permission to have him unchained. The admiral was so grateful; he took him to Rome and adopted him as his son. Later when the admiral died, Ben-Hur inherited his great wealth. He eventually made his way back to Jerusalem and was reunited with his mother and sister.

What can we learn from this story? Instead of slipping into despair from the injustice done to him, Ben-Hur burned with great desire for freedom and to right the wrong done to him. He refused to give up. Despite the hopeless situation he found himself in, he spent his time preparing himself. When opportunities came he took advantage of them.

Winston Churchill

“To every man there comes . . . that special moment when he is figuratively tapped on the shoulder and offered the chance to do a special thing unique to him and fitted to his talent. What a tragedy if that moment finds him unprepared or unqualified for the work which would be his finest hour.”

Many have had to go through tough times. Many think their situations are hopeless. Many think they are in dead-end jobs going nowhere. There is an amazing miracle waiting for those who bide their time by preparing and improving themselves.

Develop your talents. Don’t waste your time spending hours watching TV or spending unproductive time on the Internet. Take classes. Successful people never stop learning. Improve the skills you already have. Improve your reading, writing, and vocabulary.There seems to be a universal law which seems to always send opportunity to those who are moving forward. You will be amazed when that opportunity comes along that your unique collection of talents and abilities fits it perfectly.

I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward. Thomas Alva Edison.

Whether you have been smoking since your adolescence or if you just became genuinely addicted, hypnosis quit smoking treatments can assist you get on top of the intense cravings that most persons experience when they try to quit smoking. The process of hypnosis to support stop smoking involves a hypnotherapy’s who guides the patient into a heightened condition of awareness that is also a dreamlike state.

In this state of perception, the patient is highly susceptible to suggestions. The hypnotherapies will suggest a variety of phrases that help to cut down the patient’s cravings and reliance on cigarettes. Many therapists claim that the pressure reduction brought about via hypnosis is the primary explanation why it works. Patients feel less stress and are therefore less likely to use cigarettes as a means to reduce stress throughout the day.

Though hypnosis quit smoking methods do appear to travail in the short term, there is still much debate pertaining to the long-term effects of the treatments. For example, hypnosis can help some person stop smoking for a few months, but after the treatments are finished, it may be hard for a patient to continue to thwart the drive to smoke. However, hypnosis is still considered one of the most popular commonplace stop smoking aids. Because it does not include prescription or nicotine supplements, it is one of the healthiest ways to quit smoking.

There are typically a few hypnosis quit smoking clinics in most metropolitan areas. For instance, Atlanta hypnosis quit smoking clinics are scattered all over throughout the city. With regular stop smoking methods gaining more and more approval, hypnosis is becoming one of the more common ways to obtain quit smoking support.

A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step. Lao-tzu, Tao-te Ching.

When you are trying to quit smoking, hypnosis quit smoking methods and alternate ways to help yourself quit are only as productive as your willpower allows them to be. You have to be ready to give up smoking before even the finest quit smoking way will work. Quit smoking tips can only go so far when it comes to reducing your cravings.

You must be ready to fight your urges in order for any quit smoking aids to be useful. However, if you are resolute to quit smoking, you can use any figure of stop smoking products to help you along on your journey toward a smoke-free lifestyle. From natural to medical alternatives, you are never by oneself while you are trying to quit smoking.

There is a meta-physical side to this. Some people will tell you that you can bring the right situations or coincidences into your life simply by focusing on what you want. You might believe this or you might not. Even if you don’t, you have to admit that people who keep their goals on their minds are more alert. They see things that others miss. I have encountered it many times in the past. When I just started my first business back at University, my first priority was to get clients. It was difficult for me to do this. I didn’t know where to start from. I also had my studies on my mind at the time. So I tried to partition the time I had for both. My business partner was different. Though he was studying perhaps even harder than I was, he always managed to keep the business on his mind as well. So, he always came upon opportunities for clients or ideas, while I was lost. I didn’t even notice these opportunities as they passed by.

Sustaining focus indefinitely can be quite difficult. There is so much more in life fighting for our attention. So it helps if you can prioritise. Make this goal one of the most important things in your life, so it stays with you. It should be something that stimulates you. That way, it won’t be easily drowned out by the background noise. As you go about your activities, you can consider circumstances in the context of your goal. You will notice more opportunities. You will have more lucky breaks. You will increase your chances of success.

You would be surprised how much could be gained by throwing out a casual comment regarding your interest in a conversation in shop. Maybe the stranger you are talking to could turn out to be an investor. Maybe he will have some useful advice that could aid you on your path. You might see a billboard with a message that could trigger a new idea in your mind. All of this could happen; but the chances are dramatically increased by ensuring that your mind is focussed.

So if, for instance, your goal is financial independence (you and most other people!); keep it on your mind…and not in the fearful way most people do. Just be alert. Observe your environment and the people you meet everyday. When your chance comes, you will be able to see it and grab it.

It’s all about focus.

I’m hearing the comment more and more often that we have become a victim society. Maybe this is true? Consider…

Don’t we hear these comments a lot? I was mistreated when I was a child… I was a lonely latchkey kid… My ancestors got a bad break, so I’m… I lived in a poor, disadvantaged family… I grew up in a broken home… I didn’t get the proper advantages… I was constantly criticized as a child…

Every one of these comments sounds a lot like self-pity, like “I can’t be helped because I’ve been scarred beyond reclaim.”

Well, maybe all of the bare facts are true, but isn’t it time to start looking for the positives that are buried in all that negative stuff?

Example: I was mistreated when I was a child… …and as a result, I learned to be a survivor and to resist all efforts to crush my spirit. Sure I had some hard times back then, but now, I’m both tough and sensitive. I didn’t learn self esteem then, but I’ve learned it as an adult, and I understand people better for it.

Example: I was a latchkey kid… …and everyone treated me like an abandoned orphan. But it was great. My dad and mom fought all the time, so coming home to a quiet house was a wonderful break, and I loved it.

See what I’m getting at here?

You have the right to take any piece of your personal history and reinterpret it to your advantage rather than to your detriment. You can find ways to turn your past to your own good.

Studies have shown that many children who grow up insecure tend to be unusually self-reliant as adults.

You don’t HAVE to be filled with resentment, anger or helplessness. You COULD choose to feel something more pleasant, at least part of the time. And if you did choose to feel better about yourself, what do you think the result might be?

Did you know this is what many of the most successful people do? If they have a terrible experience, they simply turn it this way and that till they find a new aspect to emphasize. One that makes them feel better about themselves.

Don’t believe me? Go read any great person’s biography. It’s almost a given that winners only become winners after overcoming huge difficulties. And they overcome because they keep trying, keep learning how to control their own thinking until they get good at it.

So if you’ve got anything — ANYTHING AT ALL — in your past that drags you down, angers you or depresses you, you have the right to look at it more closely. You can find more than garbage in your past. There’s gold in your history, too. And all you’ve got to do is learn to look for it.

With all the people trying to pull you down and waiting for you to fail, how can you stay motivated and positive?

Try this A to Z of tips for motivation

A – Achieving your dreams. Avoid negative people, things and places because they will only drag you down. Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”

B – Believe in your self, and in what you can do. Believe in your possibilities and your dreams. Every advancement of humankind has taken place because someone believed in themselves.

C Consider all of the angles and aspects of everything you encounter, whether it is people or situations. Motivation comes from strength of purpose. Being able to see both points of view will give you more chance of being successful and keeping those around you motivated too.

D Don’t give up and don’t give in. Every successful person from J K Rowling to Walt Disney to Sylvester Stallone to Thomas Edison had multiple failures before being successful. Sometimes their failures or rejections ran into the hundreds before they achieved success.

E Enjoy. Work as if you don’t need money. Dance as if nobody’s watching. Love as if you never cried. Learn as if you’ll live forever. Motivation takes place when people are happy.

F Family and Friends. Use your family and friends to help you stay motivated. The big football teams have cheerleaders and fans to encourage them. Your family and friends can be your cheerleaders and fans. Use them to keep you going when you feel your motivation drifting.

G Give that little bit extra. Self improvement happens everywhere all the time, whether you are at home, at work or at school. Anthony Robbins tells us that the difference in effort between excellent and outstanding is miniscule, yet the difference in rewards is massive. Giving that little bit extra can put you into the outstanding.

H Hang on to your dreams. There may be times when it looks bleak, but hang on to your dreams. The night is darkest just before the dawn. It is at this moment that you are closest to success and 95% of people will give up. Push through this moment and you’ll achieve your dreams.

I Ignore those who try to destroy you. Don’t get involved in their dramas or toxicity just walk away. Surround yourself with people who will encourage and support you. Remove those who want to pull you down and watch you fail from your life. You’ll find it much easier to stay motivated.

J Joy and gratitude. Perhaps two of the fundamentals for motivation and success is to be joyful in what you do and grateful for what you have.

K Keep pushing forwards no matter how hard life may seem. In the toughest moments you can choose to move forwards or to run away. It’s your decision one path brings you closer to the success, the other takes you away from it. Which do you want to follow?

L Learn to love your self. This isn’t as easy as it sounds for most people, but by loving yourself you will be happier and more motivated because you will believe you deserve what you achieve.

M Make things happen. Motivation and success doesn’t come from sitting in front of the television drinking coke and eating pizza. Take action and you’ll achieve your dreams.

N Never lie, cheat or steal. Always play a fair game. At the end of the day, if you live a dishonest life, it will come back to you. Living an honest, fair life allows you to be proud of what you do.

O Open your eyes. Everyone has a set of blinkers that they wear and see everything through them, i.e. how they would like things to be. Look at life with open eyes and see things how they are, and see them how you want them to be. Then take action to make it happen.

P Practice makes perfect. The more you practice, the better you become. A top sportsman doesn’t reach their status through a single practice or game. They practice harder and longer than anyone else, and as such, are rewarded more than anyone else.

Q Quitters never win. And winners never quit. So, which do you want to be?

R Ready yourself. Always be ready to take advantage of the opportunities and situations presented to you. Prepare in advance, and ignore the voice telling you to put it off until tomorrow. Remember, it wasn’t raining when Noah built the ark!

S Stop procrastinating. You can put it all off until tomorrow, but one day there will be no more tomorrows. Start procrastinating about procrastinating and do tomorrows jobs today.

T Take control of your life. Discipline and self control are synonymous with motivation. So many people believe their lives are out of their control. Look at your life in detail and you’ll discover you have more areas under your control than you think.

U Understand others. If you know very well how to talk, you should also learn how to listen. You have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Understand others and strive to be understood.

V Visualise it. Your sub-conscious knows no difference between your imagination and reality, so if you rehearse your success in your mind, then your sub-conscious will believe in it and make it happen.

W Want it more than anything. Every successful person has had a burning desire to achieve their goals. The Wright brothers didn’t invent the aeroplane because there was nothing on the television. They had a burning desire to succeed and kept going, even in the face of setbacks.

X X Factor is what will make you different from the others. When you are motivated, you tend to put on “extras” on your life like extra time for family, extra help at work, extra care for friends. This X-Factor sets you aside from the crowd and marks you out for success.

Y You are unique. No one in this world looks, acts, thinks or talks like you. Value your unique gifts, whatever they are and use them for your success.

Z Zero in on your dreams and make it happen!!!