Monthly Archives: November 2008

Where Did My Old World Go?

You’ve just bought a new car. It’s the latest model; it has the whiz-bang features that will definitely single you out from the merely mortal driving rank and file. You know you paid a bit (maybe a lot) too much, but with this car you make a unique and powerful statement to all others on the road. This car is as different from the herd as you are! Yet, as you drive this rare sparkling beauty home from the lot you suddenly notice the roadways dotted with several other nearly identical cars. Hmmm…never noticed those before. Somewhat deflated, it slowly dawns on you that your chromium highlighted beauty came from an assembly line, and it obviously wasn’t the only one of it’s species turned out that day. You ‘uniqueness’ becomes similar to dozens of other drivers.

This is an occurrence so common it has a name: “seeing the same car syndrome.” How is it that our subjective experience of the world can change so sharply with a simple purchase? We can either assume there is a profound metaphysical change, and the infinite cosmic auto-assembly plant suddenly seeded our roads with more of your cherished previously ‘unique’ vehicle; or, that somehow the act of buying and valuing this four-wheeled beauty has changed your perceptual apparatus. I am going to argue for the latter, and show you how to use that phenomenon.

Our experience of the world is made up of a magical concoction of sensory experience, memory, and imagination. Research has shown that our visual experience of our world at any given moment is made up of approximately 30 percent actual sensory data, and 70 percent of memory and imagination. Most of what we see isn’t technically what’s there, but what we think ought to be there. That last bit makes way for some delightful mischief. Obviously, sight isn’t the only sense involved, and there is a corroborative networking of sight and sound (the two distance senses). Vision, however, is usually the more distinct and detailed sense, and will tend to drive the auditory sense. If you doubt this, and are old enough, recall drive-in theaters. We would put a cheesy speaker in one window, and watch a screen usually at least half a football field away. Within a few minutes, we would forget the actual screen/speaker placement, and hallucinate the sounds emanating from the screen.

So, according to this argument, those cars were always there, they were just existing in that 70% of your visual world with which you have artistic license.

As a stage hypnotist, I can suggest a volunteer visually hallucinate the crowd as naked. I am not asking the client to violate his actual optical experience; I am merely playing with the 70% majority part of his visual experience that he is ‘making up’ anyway.

More usefully, I can suggest to a person with a fear of public speaking, that the crowd she sees are smiling, supporting her, and wishing her well. I am only suggesting changes in the part of her experience that she is mentally constructing. 30% of the crowd she really sees may be responding however they do good, bad, or indifferent. I’m just asking her to focus on the friendly bunch that she has created. They are smiling, and so is she.

How about if you make up your mind to see opportunity. Make your waking thoughts the instruction “The world is full of opportunity, and I am going to see it today!” You’ll begin to have an effect on the 70% of the world that you have an automatic say about. If you can see lots of people driving your car, you might be able to see lots of people offering you new opportunities. At least it is worth a try.

An Atypical Success

Melba Rae likely never traveled the world. It’s likely that she never rode in a limousine. She had none of the trappings of fame and there was probably very little fortune. She was just an ordinary woman that was extraordinary in her ordinary profession.

Most of us have many teachers in our life. As we think back on our years in school we can often recall the names and some of the characteristics but there are not many who have a lasting place in our hearts. Melba Rae was different. I am sure that she holds a lasting place in every one of her student’s hearts.

High School students tend to think that they are all grown up. Of course, they are almost grown up being in the last years of the schooling they started back when they were five. Most of the teachers from my high school treated us like that also. School was serious business. We were all preparing for life ahead, college admissions, job placements, preparing for where our lives would lead us when we no longer were told where to go and what to do with our days.

Many seniors had most of the credits required to graduate. Many of the seniors were able to attend school for half a day during senior year. But almost every senior signed up to take Miss Barnett’s Advanced Composition class whether they needed it or not. It was not the class or the credit. It was being able to be in Miss Barnett’s class.

Many a student would walk around the halls with a gold star on their forehead after being in Miss Barnett’s class. Tootsie Pops were also handed our freely for active participation in class. She taught us to write and she taught us to think. She spoke to us as equals and reminded us that we were smart and ready to face the world. Every one of us was important to her, from the smartest valedictorian to the one who struggled to put a sentence together on paper. We were all equally loved and important to Miss Barnett.

She said that all of her students were her kids. Miss Barnett had never married. She claimed to be waiting for Efrem Zimbalist Jr. to come along and sweep her away. Most of us were too young to know who Efrem Zimbalist Jr. was but Miss Barnett explained to us that he was the most handsome man in the world. He was an actor of course. At a later time I saw an old photograph. He was very handsome, indeed!

When I think back on some the things I learned from Miss Barnett, there are not so many lasting things that I recall that have affected my writing. She hated the words “a lot” claiming that a “lot” was a piece of ground and the word had no place in compositions. I still find myself searching for an alternative if I am tempted to use the word. I never misspell the word “separate” because Miss Barnett always said, “se-PA-rate”. But the other things I cannot specifically recall, yet she undoubtedly affected my love for words and for writing.

At my senior classes commencement exercises we chose Miss Barnett to give the speech. It was the first time a teacher had ever been given such an honor. But it was well deserved and it showed our great respect for our favorite teacher. A couple of years later she passed away.

Miss Barnett may not have had many of the things that we all think of as success. She didn’t have the typical trappings. She did not have money. She did not live in a big house. She did not have the handsome husband (Efrem never did come!). But Miss Barnett found Joy and Happiness in her work. She gave it her all and it all came back to her. Every student loved her and respected her and learned from her.

Miss Melba Rae Barnett was an enormous success.

Get Your Goals Done!

I used to have too many goals that I was highly motivated and enthusiastic to achieve.

But I found myself working very hard in the first one or two weeks then everything returns back as it was. I was quickly losing motivation, enthusiasm and persistence to achieve my goals.

I even felt distracted due to the too many goals I set for myself and felt disappointed when I found myself achieved nothing of them!

**Do you have similar problems?

One day I discovered a secret that changed my life. It was about human nature and how we become highly committed to get our goals done!

This secret is extremely powerful and will let you achieve your wildest dreams.

The secret is…

*** Human nature is such that when we know someone else is going to ask us about something, we are much more motivated to get it done.

*Accountability*

Accountability is a powerful tool to get what you want.

In your way to achieve your goals you will need someone to keep you motivated, and remind you with your dreams and the benefits that you will get by achieving your goals. You will need someone to support you when you fall short of your goals.

There are two types of accountability…

1. Internal Accountability

First and foremost, you have to know that you are fully responsible for holding yourself accountable to achieve your goals. It is your life and your goals. So you have to be honest with yourself and be highly self-motivated to get what you want.

This can’t be achieved without being clear about your true purpose in life and knowing who you were created to be and gifted to become. Having a meaning to live for and passion for something that is unique for you will give you the self motivation and accountability power that will hold you accountable to get your goals done.

2. External Accountability

Finding a partner, friend, or coach who cares about you and who you can share your goals and dreams with will help a lot in keeping you on track and following up with you.

A coach or a partner will ask you questions, sometimes be tough with you and sometimes give you another added boost to getting your goals done.

Share this idea with a friend and you can both hold each other accountable till each one of you achieve his goals.

Accountability will put you on the fast track to success and maximum achievement. It will make you soar higher.

Discover your life purpose now and fire the passion inside you for a worthy life.

Find a partner or a coach to work with you until you get your goals done! You will be extraordinarily glad you did!

*** Accountability will keep you oaring until YOU GET YOUR GOALS DONE!

My friend you can make a difference, I believe in you.

Cosmic Ordering – The Power of Positive Thinking

If you have found your way to read this article, something within you has been triggered consciously or otherwise to seek a path which you can take to change your life in a positive way forever. What you are about to discover shortly is not something new, but in fact a frame of mind and a process that is as old as mankind itself. You will learn that by taking a simple course of action and by following time tested instructions, your life, your mental attitude, your health and an abundance of other things will change and the physical things you desire will actually manifest themselves to you.

Before we start, it is important that you read and re-read the following, because this is the fundamental foundation.

The Power of Positive Thinking is a theory that contends if you believe good things will happen to you, there will be some sort of cataclysmic shift in the energies surrounding you which will actually cause good things to happen to you. For as many people who believe in the power of positive thinking, there are many more who believe it’s all a bunch of New Age pop psychology drivel or sugar-coated Peter Pan platitudes.

Here’s the thing: they’re all right.

You see, positive thinking is a system of beliefs. So if you believe it doesn’t work- then, of course, it won’t work. And if you believe it does work…well, you get the idea. For non-believers, using positive thinking is like trying to get a job after high school. You need experience to get a job, but you need a job to get the experience. It can be difficult to know where you’re supposed to start. But just like any other process, the key to making positive thinking work for you is to start small. Plant seeds, if you will, and then learn how to tend and cultivate those seeds until you have a mental garden that bears a phenomenal crop, year after year. Anything is possible with positive thinking…even if you do believe it’s all a bunch of crap.

Norman Vincent Peale, the father of positive thinking, once said: “If you have zest and enthusiasm you attract zest and enthusiasm. Life does give back in kind.” This is the essence of positive thinking. It’s not so much a theory as it is a contagious disease. Just as anger and negativity spread quickly from person to person, so do humor and happiness- only good feelings spread far faster. Think about it: have you ever noticed that the quickest way to ease a tense situation is to make a joke? The instant someone laughs or smiles, a sense of relief spreads through everyone in the vicinity. Even if the angered parties don’t feel better, they are at least able to discuss the problem in a detached and objective way, and get on with their lives instead of dwelling on negativity. For that same reason, solo drivers who get cut off in traffic tend to remain angry for at least the rest of the drive- because there is no one else near them to send out good vibrations and break the tension. Makes sense, doesn’t it?

Let us get started as the seeds of belief are already there. Your next step is to clear your mind’s garden of doubt and get ready to plant. You’ll learn how to take all that negativity and mulch it down into fertilizer that will let your possibilities grow.

Banish negativity from your mind

To tune in to the power of positive thinking, you should probably start small- particularly if you don’t believe it will work. It’s one thing to tell yourself, “Tomorrow, when I wake up in the morning I won’t hit snooze a dozen times and feel drowsy for the rest of the day,” and quite another to tell yourself, “Tomorrow, when I wake up in the morning I’ll be living independently wealthy and living in a mansion.” (Unless, of course, you are in fact independently wealthy and living in a mansion at the moment; in which case you might try to think your way into ownership of a small country.)

The process of making positive thinking work for you begins with destruction, or at least a mild shift in your thought structure. In order to make room for new methods and ideas, you must first tear out all the old negativity patterns you’ve been building throughout your life. For some, this can be a gradual process: as you witness positive thinking work for you, one small step at a time, you will slowly clear out those good-things-only-happen-to-other-people thoughts, and be able to cultivate the seeds of change.
What’s holding you back? Even those who fully embrace the theory of positive thinking may feel some qualms over entrusting their lives to mere thought. There are many possibilities that could be producing weeds in your mental garden, and the best way to get rid of a weed is to yank it out, roots and all. In this section we’ll discuss some of the most common stumbling blocks people encounter on the road to positive thinking, as well as how to overcome them and lay the foundation for a healthy life outlook.

Self-Esteem: Catching the “I-Love-Me” Disease

For most of human existence, self-esteem was an unheard-of notion akin to the theories of those heretics who believed the world was round. The term “self-esteem” – defined by Webster’s Dictionary as “pride in oneself; self-respect” – made its way into the common public awareness during the ’60s and ’70s as a catch-all term to describe the essence of parenting problems. The “old ways” of parenting were pronounced barbaric and damaging to the budding self-esteem of our youth, and many parents fearful of raising unhappy, ill-adjusted children took advice that led to a generation of children with high self-esteem…so high it eclipsed personal responsibility and created a “me-first” mentality.

On the other hand, most of us are taught that thinking highly of ourselves is a vain, selfish and undesirable trait. Advice telling us to feel better about ourselves and occasionally put us first seems counterintuitive at best. After all, isn’t self-love the first step on the road to Ego Central? Many people want to feel good about themselves, but guilt too often rears its ugly head and stops healthy self-esteem from developing.

Because of these conflicting viewpoints, self-esteem is a tricky little emotion to manipulate. It’s important to strike a balance between modesty and greed. It takes practice to convince yourself that you are a worthwhile and deserving person, while at the same time keeping in mind that you’re not the center of the universe. Though it may sound impossible, it’s actually simple to accomplish.

What Does It Mean To “Self Improve?”

Self Improvement has become mainstream. In the last few years, since I have been writing articles and submitting them to article sites, I’ve noticed that the category of “Self Improvement” has been showing up lately when it was never there before. To me, this is very good news.

But what does it really mean to “Self Improve?” What are we really improving when we self improve? And what “self” are we improving?

We each have two “selves” our wounded self and our core Self. Our core Self is our true self, our natural soul self our essence. Our core Self is our passion, our joy, our gifts and talents, our ability to love, our creativity. We come into this life as our core Self, and when this Self is loved and valued by our parents, we continue to naturally grow our God-given gifts and talents and manifest the fullness of our beings. This Self wants to improve by learning the skills necessary to fully express itself.

But when this Self is not seen and valued in the way we needed, we create an alternative self, a self we hope will have control over getting the love we need and avoiding the pain we can’t handle a self to help us feel safe. This is our false self, our wounded self, our ego self. This self is filled with the false beliefs that we absorbed as we were growing up beliefs that end up limiting our true, core Self. This self does not needs improving it needs healing.

The term “self improvement” can sometimes be a bit misleading, because we do not want to improve our wounded self. We do not want to improve on the ways we lie, manipulate, and avoid in our attempts to have control over getting love and avoiding pain. We don’t want to improve on our many addictions to substance and processes. We don’t want to improve on our anger, our compliance, our withdrawal and our resistance.

We want to heal it.

Healing and improving are not the same thing.

We can certainly self-improve when it comes to skills. We can improve in sports, in art, music, writing, cooking. We can improve our health and wellbeing by improving our diet and exercise program. We can improve in the knowledge we need to be more successful regarding work and money. We might be able to improve our relationships by learning new communication skills. But what if acquiring new knowledge and skills does not improve our health, or our ability to earn money, or our relationships? And what if learning new skills does not bring us more joy and inner peace? It may mean that we need to heal the underlying fears and false beliefs that cause us to be anxious, depressed, stressed, guilt-ridden, shamed, withdrawn, angry, blaming, or sad.

Sometimes Self Improvement just means practicing a skill, and others times it means that we need to participate in a deep healing process. For example, many people try to improve their health by losing weight and exercising. But if their food addictions are covering over unhealed pain, they might not be able to just change their diet. They might need to open to a healing process in order to eventually improve.

If you are really trying to self improve but find yourself stuck and unable to progress, or find that you have no joy or inner peace, you might want to open to the possibility that unhealed pain and beliefs are blocking your progress and causing your pain. It is easy to improve yourself when there is nothing blocking the way. But if you have old false beliefs about your adequacy and worth, these beliefs may be blocking your ability to take loving action in your own behalf. All your efforts to self improve will not bring you the satisfaction you are seeking if you have beliefs that are keeping you limited in fully expressing your true, core Self. If you are stuck, then you need to seek out a healing process, such as the Inner Bonding process we teach, that will move you out of the fears and beliefs that limit you. Healing these fears and limiting beliefs will open the door to improving your life in all ways!

How To Be More Attractive: Gotta Have Sense Of Humor!

Men having great sense of humor ranked number three as being a personality trait that attracts women on survey results conducted by several magazines. Topping the survey is physical appearance and number two, financial stability.

Laughing can be very beneficial to one’s health, according to researchers. And a great sense of humor, which creates laughter, can make a lot of difference specially when dating women.

A lot of women see a guy with a great sense of humor very attractive mainly because it makes the conversation a lot lighter, it makes them laugh and dating a man who is very serious in his outlook in life makes the conversation heavy and can become very boring, according to studies, among two hundred college students.

The same study indicated that women like intelligent men and a great sense of humor is linked to intelligence, as a man with wits can think fast, able to produce a joke instantly that is suitable to the situation is clever indeed and is no “non-sense”.

Indeed, “laughter is the best medicine”. Considerable research and studies have proved that laughter and humor benefits the body as well as the emotion. It boost the “immune system”, reduces stress, relax the muscles, “lowers blood pressure”, increases pain tolerance and hastens the process of healing. No wonder women feel so good being with a man with great sense of humor!

Men having good sense of humor are always cheerful. To them, each day is sunny. Should dark clouds appear, they depend on laughter, confident that all problems will pass and instead of being discouraged, they move on with so much hope.

Even if a man is not really that attractive physically, but with a great sense of humor, women are usually drawn to him. Why? Because according to most women in a survey result, they are more at ease with these types of men, as they make the women laugh and as a result, let them feel that they can open up almost anything; a man with a great sense of humor encourages the woman to be confident.

Generally, men with a sense of humor have so much spunk in life. Not only can they come up with a joke unrehearsed, but also can take a joke.

Here are ways to sharpen and improve your sense of humor:

1. Encourage an environment of laughter and humor in the relationship that you have by concentrating on the comical or funny side of things and delighting in the laughter that they bring to mind. Then, you will soon begin to see humor in things that you do, including the problems that may come and handle them without stress in your relationship.

2. When you feel that you do not laugh that much and you feel that you should correct this, associate yourself with fun loving and humorous people. Try to go to happy places and you and your partner can engage in fun and lively activities.

3. Try laughing at yourself and at the situations around you. Many individuals are not able to laugh because they are insecure of themselves and because of personal fears. Often, they are scared to look silly in front of others and give the impression to be foolish, according to psychiatrists. It is essential to become conscious that all people make or commit mistakes and it is when you put up a pleasant laugh can make such mistake appear human.

4. Read on humorous books and collect clean jokes. Then when the need arises, there is always a joke ready to lighten up someone else’s day!

5. So as to neutralize disagreement in your relationship, use humor. When things in your relationship get uptight, “self deprecating humor” can lighten things. “Self-deprecating humor” encourages humility and nurtures courage, needed to take off the mask that one wears when insecure and uncovers one’s weakness to his partner.

Having sense of humor in your relationship will add so much zest, help it become rewarding and can help both partners see life in a different perspective. A more carefree, cheerful and positive relationship will prosper as a result of a happy disposition between couples.

Metamorphosing Into An Expert

Every last one of us wishes we could turn into experts. I think it would be remarkable to have people run to you each time that they have a question. Then, you can sit down wisely, ponder over their problems, and find the ideal answer from the top of your head. Well, it may not be terribly easy to turn into an expert. It requires years of study, and years of experience. Six months working in an office will not make you the entrepreneurial messiah.

Too many of us are too scattered to become experts at a particular topic. We largely prefer to be jacks of all trades and masters of none. Not that it is a problem to try to be acquainted with only the basics of most subjects. However, the consequence of this is that we lose out on actually becoming an expert. We can repair a fuse, fill out forms, and help out others who are looking for some advice. However, few of us non-experts can reach beyond and get a level of expertise that the common folk lack.

Even experts are unable to talk intelligently about every subject in the world. A professor of History, for example, may be a walking encyclopedia when talking about historical things. He may also have a fairly good knowledge of the art of the period. However, to expect him to also be a connoisseur of modern art is expecting a little too much.

Similarly, it is unfair to expect a mortgage consultant to be exceptionally well-versed in the fluctuations taking place in the share markets. He may have a lot of information about of the current market situation. However, it is not necessary that he has to be well-versed in the various process of the markets.

And what about psychics? A lot of people claim to have psychic abilities. Yet, only a few of them have truly been successful in giving highly accurate psychic readings. So anyone who wants an exact reading goes to those experts only.

I would love to be an expert in Java or C++ or some other programming language. However, that would involve a great deal of effort — effort that I am not ready to put in at this point of time. So if I have a problem (and this is not just limited to programming languages), the simplest thing to do is to run to an expert and get him/her to help me solve it. There really is no point in hassling myself by looking far and wide for answers when there are experts that are ready to help out.

The 10 Steps To Emotional Healing

You may think that emotional issues should be relegated to the couch in your local therapist or psychologist’s office, yet if you have experienced anything in your past that has left you feeling hurt, disappointed, or not enough, you are walking around with unresolved emotional issues. While you may think you are masking them effectively and they don’t affect your business, guess again. Have you ever met an irate or rude vendor that just seemed to have a “chip” on their shoulder? Have you had to deal with an employee who seems to be depressed or have sadness in their energy? Have you ever held back from sharing a business idea or your business vision with someone because you doubted that they would take you seriously?

All of these scenarios exist solely because of unresolved and unhealed emotional issues. Whether or not you are aware of it, I would be willing to bet that you are still harboring something that is holding back your success. Unless you are highly aware of the state of your heart and know how to walk yourself through the steps to emotional healing, you are more than likely slowing your potential success because of your issues.

Now for the good news…you can do something about it. As a matter of fact, you can be completely free of any and all emotional triggers, pain, and unresolved hurt. Although it doesn’t happen overnight, the old myth that time heals all pain is simply not true. You only heal and release to the extent that you handle the pain. While women usually cover their emotional issues with sadness, shopping, or developing a hardened attitude, men’s hurt shows up with exaggerated toughness or a larger than-life ego. It may also show up in cockiness or avoiding relationships that could potentially leave them open to future hurt.

By following the following steps, you can eradicate your messed-up emotions once and for all:

1. Acknowledge that incomplete pain is present.

2. Identify the source of the pain. When did it begin? Who is it associated with? When was the last time you remember not having this emotional pain?

3. Fully realize the depth of the pain you are feeling. When you allow yourself to feel it, how badly does it hurt? Where do you carry the pain?

4. Ask yourself what you made it mean about yourself. What conclusions did you draw about yourself? What did you attach or Velcro to what happened? How are you punishing yourself? How are you sabotaging yourself? Did you make it mean that you aren’t good enough or worthy enough?

5. Remember the negative and positive that you experienced. What lessons did you learn? What blessings have come out of the pain?

6. Express your pain. Let it out…bring completion to the situation without doing harm to yourself or anyone else. Go beyond the anger. Write it. Speak it. Scream it (into a pillow or on a walk in the woods).

7. Re-program yourself to redefine your reality. Work on the things that make you feel lovable and deserving of the best. Post what you really want to internalize and believe on your walls, in your wallet, on your desk and on your dashboard.

8. Pray! Pray! Pray! Take time to get in touch with God and the fact that you are a child of God. Give your burden to God. Release it. Ask God to take the pain from your heart and spirit. He will. You can wake up and no longer have to carry that raw feeling of hurt and pain.

9. Forgive yourself and the other(s) involved. They didn’t know better or didn’t act on what they know to be right at the time. Even if it appeared that they vindictively or purposely set out to hurt you, they did what they knew to do at the time. They may have even been doing the best they could at the time. Write a letter to every person you have not yet forgiven. Ask a friend to pretend to be that person and listen to all you have to say. Talk it out with yourself. Do what you have to do in a safe way.

10. See it, speak it, be it!!!

You can take any issue still hiding out in your emotional baggage (see Ericka’s article, Are You Masking Your Success? for a full explanation of your emotional baggage) and walk it through these steps and you will be released from it. The best way is to think through the steps and then write them down to get them out. Once you write them down, do something with them. Burn them. Tear them up. Bury them. Perform some ritual that represents letting it go. I once even went to a stream, ripped up my steps and watched them go downstream. Do whatever it takes to be emotionally free of your barriers to the fearless life you deserve. It is not only possible, it is time.

Why Complaining Knocks You Off The Cliff To A Horrid Death

Are you constantly griping? Looking at the bad side of things ultimately makes it a self-fulfilling prophecy: everything goes rotten!

Rememer, you are what you think you are.

Instead of complaining about what you lack, cultivate and appreciate what you do have. Nurturing your attitude so you become a positive person, and appreciating who you are based on your capabilities, will create a positive outcome. Your trip to success depends on the decisions you make. Your task is to envision the situation from a ‘selfless’ perspective rather than a selfish one. Take responsibility for your actions. If you feel your actions produce negative results, and the outcome is unacceptable, then shift your actions.

As you allow yourself the liberty to change, you also allow yourself the freedom to rise and discover new roads to success. Remember a time or a situation when you faced a moderate degree of challenge. You may have noticed a distinct change in your feelings. As the time drew closer to achieving whatever it was you set out to accomplish, you felt more alive and more aware of your surroundings. Your aliveness and vitality produce pleasurable feelings and is self-encouraging. Your paradigms and emotions reach new peaks and plateaus as you plot your direction with conviction.

When one door, or opportunity, closes another one bangs wide open. It’s really good cliche! The opportunity for challenge helps you to grow, change, and take charge of yourself. Working towards a new and exciting goal, or eliminating a non-empowering emotion or habit, empowers you to control your present situation and your life. As your ability to develop a new perspective grows, you put yourself in the driver’s seat to greater self-actualization.

Admit it, there are folks in this world that enjoy pissing you off. Maybe it’s because they lack direction in life, and attempt to communicate their frustration to you by pushing your anger buttons. They may feel that they have no other way to relieve their pain but to cause you pain. If they resist communicating with you in a positive way, let go of the situation. Give yourself a time frame to decide how long you’ll put up with their manipulative behavior. There’s no reason to let unwarranted conflict or pain affect your life. Speaking up for yourself is your choice and decision.

Fury and frustration with others will slow you down and block your progress toward success. Making a move to slow down, speed up, or get out of their way by changing your direction, is a positive step forward. Whether your challenge or adversity be facing the situation (or person) or letting go of it, taking action is your opportunity for change and success. Your ability to master your emotions depends on the positive decisions you make. Creating a life of personal fulfillment is based on your inner strength, determination and communication. You won’t know where you’re going until you start heading in that direction. Direct yourself to the path that provides maximum enjoyment and positive interactions with everyone!

Eight Stress Banishers

Eight Ways To Diminish Stress At The Job

1. Articulate feelings and passion. Putting stress into words through interaction with colleagues can thwart the seclusion often felt during the later period of burnout. The trade of ideas acts as a shock absorber because sharing and communicating has a exceptional way of relieving anxiety and putting things in perspective.

2. Plan down time. Each one needs breaks away from work. As a substitute of using lunch or coffee breaks to catch up on ongoing or extra work, fritter down time doing something completely distinct to work. Time off is utterly essential in invigorating attitudes and job outlook.

3. Distinguish energy patterns and plan work accordingly. During a regular work day, we all have high and low levels of liveliness. Finding out when high energy levels take place and then scheduling stressful functions only during those times will foil wear out and energy loss.

4. Never schedule more than one taxing pursuit at the same time. This may take some thought and preparation beforehand, but putting up with only one demanding situation at any given time will avert work pileup, make you believe like you’re accomplishing more, and mitigate the stress of’ feeling overworked.

5. Engage in external physical activities. It’s imperative to partake in physical exercise because inspiring the body refreshes the mind. Our brain requires activity by the rest of our body in order to regenerate the senses and enhance performance. Exercise also builds physical resistance and makes us feel better about ourselves. When stagnation sets in, strength and energy are lowered, and the ordinary tendency is to become more vulnerable to physical and emotional distress.

6. Fracture projects down into smaller parts. Some of us have a tendency to become besieged by a project soon after we start it. By cutting a large project down to its particular components, it never looks as arduous or overwhelming. We can then embark upon it piece by piece and never even realize how immense it is until it’s finally done.

7. Delegate accountability. If we’re ever in a position to delegate power to others, we should make it a point to do so. Rather than seize on every problem that comes up, we should allow others to share in problem solving and decision making.

8. Find out how to say no. Don’t feel duty-bound to take on further assignments or do special projects which aren’t mandatory but which cause feelings of anger and hostility. Saying yes all the time makes us feel powerless, while being able to say no gives us a feeling of influence and satisfaction. This isn’t the same as not wanting to get involved and steadfast. Giving ourselves the choice of what we want to be concerned in or committed to is the kind of control we need to have to become anxiety free.