Monthly Archives: July 2009

An Ultimate Lifestyle Secret – The Power Of Self Confidence

Self confidence is not something that holds me back, in fact I really appreciate the level of confidence I enjoy and feel that I can make the choices and decisions I want without a feeling of concern or over riding fear. That is not to say that I am always successful, but I realize that even by trying I am moving closer to a higher level of confidence.

I did not always have a high level of self confidence. When I was younger, I had a lot of self confidence in my ability to do well in football and track, but my confidence in my ability to deal with life’s challenges was quite low. This was probably caused by a fear of not measuring up to my parent’s expectations and a little bit of social shyness. However, as I got older, I realized that my parents only wanted me to be healthy and to try my best at everything I did. As a member of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police, I had a lot of social interaction with people from all walks of life and I lost most of my shyness. My job also required that I respond to all different kinds of situations. The more success I had, the more my self confidence rose.

Self confidence or confidence in yourself means that you know that you can do whatever task you are faced with. This does not mean that you have to do every task by yourself. It means that the ones you know you can do by yourself you do and the ones where you need help you know how to find it. Confidence is a learned trait, not something you are born with. It is the force which pushes you forward and allows you to find the right path amidst the confusion and chaos of life. Confidence is the necessity you must have to assist you in realizing your dreams and goals.

We all have the power of self confidence within us. Sadly many leave it unused for long periods of time while others use it sparingly like a miser. Forget about past worries and build the power of self confidence within you. Since you can’t change the mistakes of the past, don’t let them spoil the present or dim the future.

The first thing that you must practice is “don’t hate yourself” before deciding to practice self confidence. It is very difficult to become self confident if you do not like yourself. Remember, just like everyone else, you were born into this world for a specific reason. Think about the things that you are good at doing. Work at becoming better at them. Don’t worry about the things that you are not very good at. As a very successful person I was talking to recently said, “Why spend your limited time here on earth working on things you are not good at. Instead perfect the things you are good at and hire someone to do the things you are not good at.”

Mediocrity and poor performance are often due to low self confidence but it is not something you have to live with. You can build your self confidence by challenging yourself to take action and do something. Even though you feel as if you lack confidence, it doesn’t mean other people can tell. Building good self confidence is a wonderful thing, and it’s much easier than you’d imagine. One of the easiest ways of building self confidence is to “take baby steps.” What I mean by this is to set small goals or projects that you have to complete. Each time you do one in the time you have set for yourself, you will build your self confidence. The accumulation of small “victories” will convince your subconscious mind that you can do what you set out to do. It will then convince your conscious mind that you have a lot of capabilities and your self confidence will grow. If you continue to do this over a period of months, you will find that your self confidence becomes greatly improved. With improved self confidence you can take on bigger projects and goals and as these are completed your self confidence will grow by leaps and bounds.

So what other techniques are available to anyone wishing to develop more self confidence? It should be no surprise to you when I tell you that the single most influential person on your self confidence is you, or more specifically, your mind. This probably sounds very basic but are you using your own thoughts to reenforce your self confidence and self esteem? Talk positively to yourself all the time. Become your own best friend and supporter. Encourage yourself to do more. Congratulate yourself on every small or large victory. Remember that very few people are successful the first time they try to do something. You didn’t ride a bike the first time you tried. Thomas Edison didn’t invent the light bulb on his first attempt either. It took him more than 10,000 attempts before he made the first successful light bulb and it only lasted a few minutes. The biggest thing to remember is that you are never defeated in doing anything you want to do until you quit. Donald Trump, during a recent interview, stated that he was richer than most people because he failed more times than most. However, in his case, he learned from his mistakes and tried again. Why? Because he was confident that he could do what he wanted to do if he just continued trying. You are no different from Donald Trump. Do what he did. Just keep trying until you succeed. When you do, your self confidence will soar and you will realize that you can do anything you want to as long as you continue trying.

Another technique is to watch other people. When you see someone that stands upright and moves with a sense of purpose watch to see if they give you the impression that they have a lot of confidence. If they do, duplicate the physical characteristics of these confident people and you will start to gain the confidence they display.

One thing that you must ensure that you do not do is listen to people who talk down to you or try to tell you that you cannot do something. Usually these people can’t do these things themselves, so they try to convince others that they can’t do them either. If something like this keeps happening to you, tune these people out and stop associating with them. Your inner confidence needs to be liberated from this constant barrage of negative thoughts and statements from the dream stealers around you. Your limitations are in your mind, not in your reality.

Here are some tips for everyday practice. If you want to develop and build confidence, associate with positive uplifting people. Good people around you will help you build self confidence. If you want to build up your confidence, do something new every day. Each of these small acts will add to your confidence and also make your life more enjoyable. The most sacred thing in life is self confidence because it is the secret of all miracles. When you have confidence in yourself, you arouse everything that is stronger, greater and superior in you. In consequence, the more confidence you have in yourself, the more you will attain and accomplish. A person who knows the power of self confidence walks a path of inner growth and achievement. With self confidence a person of mediocre ability can achieve more in life than those with exceptional talents and little self confidence.

Supreme self confidence is a birth right for every person so isn’t it about time you claimed yours?

Stress! What Causes It? What Is It?

What is stress?

Although we tend to think of stress as caused by external issues, issue in themselves are not stressful. It is the way in which we interpret and react to them that makes them stressful. People differ enormously in the type of events they interpret as stressful and the way in which they respond to such stress.

Stress is generally created when the demands made on a person start to exceed that person’s ability, or perceived ability to cope. Essentially a gap is created between what a person needs/wants to do, and what they feel they are able to do.

Many things or even the anticipation of them can lead to stress:

* Pressure to achieve/perform
* Problems at work
* Bullying
* Financial problems
* Arguments
* Family issues
* Divorce
* Bereavement
* Depression
* Unemployment
* Moving house
* Alcohol or drug abuse

Physical Symptoms of Stress may include:

* Tiredness
* Headaches
* Frequent colds
* Trouble sleeping
* Muscular aches/tension
* Nausea
* Sweating, feeling hot and bothered

Emotional and Mental Symptoms of Stress may include:

* Anger
* Anxiety
* Depression
* Irrational fears
* Mood swings
* Irritability
* Frustration
* Poor concentration
* Confusion
* Loss of sense of humour
* Negative thoughts
* Feeling of overwhelmed
* Feeling out of control
* Loss of motivation

Tackling stress

There are many strategies that can help you deal with stress:

* Realise that it is ok to be stressed and cut yourself some slack
* Try to understand what stresses you and why
* Avoid obvious stressful confrontations/situations
* Learn to be more assertive
* Take regular exercise
* Reduce alcohol
* Eat a balanced healthy diet
* Recognise your limits and learn to say no
* Organise your time better
* Keep your work/home space organised and tidy
* Talk to friends or family
* Listen to relaxing music, or read
* Take time out to relax

Alternatively you may benefit complementary therapies like aromatherapy, acupuncture and reflexology.

If your stress level is making it impossible for you to function as normal, it is perhaps worth seeing your GP as extreme or long-lasting stress can be very bad for your health, not to mention your relationships, so it is better to see a doctor sooner rather than later. Your GP can then advise you on the best course of action.

How To Attract A World Class Brilliant Idea

So many of the worlds most wonderful creations started as a brilliant idea.

Now, many of these brilliant ideas were ridiculed at first.
Can you imagine what the bank said to Walt Disney when he went in for funding on a magical wonderland theme park that had never been heard of before?

You have the power to come up with the same brilliance my friend.

How…by starting to ask…
“gee, you mean just ask for a brilliant idea”?

Start today and ask the Universe for brilliant, lovely,
wonderful ideas.

Add the power of “thank you” to the recipe and watch your ideas manifest magically before your eyes.

Here are some examples to get your mind open to the needless possibilities:

*I am thankful I am open to receiving new and powerful ideas.
*I am thankful I am receiving fun, easy, ideas to make more money.
*I am thankful for attracting marvelous ideas to improve my relationships.
*I am thankful a powerful idea can get me out of any sticky situation.
*I am thankful there is a creative, fun, easy solution for every problem in my life and I am open to all ideas to transform my problems.

When the ideas start coming to you, accept them all, write them down, and honor them no matter how small.

I have learned by experience that their truly is a creative solution to every problem.

Gabriella, My angel guide (and the minister of finance)
says that one of the biggest ways people stop good things from
coming is to “poo-poo” an idea or slight increase in abundance
when it starts flowing. Statements like,

‘Oh, that’s just a little dribble”,
Or”Oh, that’s not much improvement”
And the biggest one of all…
“Oh, THAT IS NOT ENOUGH”

It is almost like the Universe is teasing us, giving us a little bit of what we want to see how we align our energy and attitude.

If we “poo-poo” the little bit of improvement,
Believe me dearest hearts, we are not likely to see any more very soon..

I tell my students who take the “End Money Worries for Good”
class to be on the lookout for any improvement no matter how small.

Give your attention enthusiastically, emotionally to anything and it is going to grow.

If you cant’ get excited about just a little bit of improvement, “fake it”.

You can transform your energy by transforming you physical state.

Here are some wonderful, fun, exercises to help you do just that.

First, we need to realize that it is likely the pouty inner child that is throwing a fit about there not being enough.
It can also be the “inner critic” that tells you your ideas are not good enough.

Instead of beating yourself up for having those thoughts, we are going to love and comfort the part of ourselves that feels there is ‘Not enough”.

Get in a relaxed state Breathe deeply…

Tune in to that part of you who feels disappointed and left out, that small inner child who did not get their needs met.
That part of you that has been terrified you would not survive.

In your imagination hold, love and comfort that child.
Tell the child “thank you” for bringing me to this moment

Whisper loving words of comfort assuring them that there is enough and all is well.

Forgive yourself for taking so long to acknowledge this part of you.

Tell the child that all is well and we are home.
Move this feeling into the heart.
Ahhhhhh…

Here are a few more statements to help you accept and love yourself right now.

*I love and accept myself and my pouty Inner Child.
*I choose to allow myself to feel gratitude for every improvement.
*I choose to activate the energy of natural gratitude deep within my being,
*I choose to allow natural enthusiasm to come to me.

*I am excited to accept new ideas and fun easy ways to make my life extraordinary”.

One Degree Between Success And Failure

What’s the difference between success and failure…?

One Degree!

Have you ever seen Tiger Woods play golf?

Tiger Woods knows the importance of one degree. Why?

Well, think about this for a moment.

What’s the difference between Tiger hitting a perfect straight shot and him hitting a shot that goes way off to the right?

You guessed it… One Degree.

One degree of difference in the angle of his club can mean hitting a perfect shot or hitting a shot that goes nowhere close to the direction he wanted it to go.

So what does that have to do with you, especially if you don’t know anything about golf?

Everything!

You make decisions everyday of your life that will dictate where you end up in life. One wrong decision, if not corrected properly, can make your life go in a completely different direction than where you wanted it to go.

Now, don’t get discouraged about that. Everyone makes wrong choices in their life, finances, career, and relationships.

But how do you learn to correct those things and then how to avoid making many of those mistakes in the first place?

You need what Tiger Woods has.

You need a coach or mentor.

Tiger may be the best golfer in the world, but imagine if he didn’t have a coach. He would be out there with no one to help him correct the things that are throwing his game off. He would be out there all by himself trying to figure out what was going wrong.

You see, Tiger’s coach may not play golf as well as Tiger, but he can see and recognize the things that Tiger may not be doing correctly. He can see little things like the way Tiger is standing, the swing of his club, the angle of his club, and countless other things that Tiger may not even know. And if Tiger does know that he is doing something wrong, he may not know how to correct it.

Well, it works exactly the same way in your life. Coaches and mentors will help you get to your goal much faster because they know what you need to do, what you need to stop doing, or what you need change in order to get you to where you want to be.

Think of it this way.

You have been told that you have greatness on the inside of you. To realize that greatness you have two roads that you can choose to travel down. On the first road you must go alone. They tell you that this road is more or less the same as the second road. Both roads have potholes, speed traps, dangerous bends, detours, unnecessary exits, or unexpected obstacle.

The second road however, has a tour guide who will help you on your way. If you listen to the guide he can help you avoid many of these dangers. And if you do happen to get into some type of trouble, he knows ways to help you get back on course.

So which road would you choose?

Decide today that you are going to surround yourself with coaches and mentors in your life to help you achieve greatness in your life.

Lack Of Time! Perception or Reality

One day you’re going to college, studying and having fun; the next thing you know you’re working long hours, eating on the run, rushing home to take care of your kids or your spouse/significant other. Where does the time go? Managing time means more than managing your life against the clock. It means taking time to look at the priorities that you say are important to you. How many times do you say “I don’t have time?” Are you really saying “that is not my priority” Think about it? We are always telling others and ourselves “I would if I had the time.”

We think we have no choices about how we spend our time. Technology that was supposed to make life easier has actually done the opposite and is eating away at our personal time. Personal Digital Assistants (PDAs), computers, email, cell phones and pagers all compete for our attention. Electronic organizers and communication devices create an “on-call” work mentality that takes priority over personal responsibilities. Lack of time is more perception than reality. The problem is the lack of commitment to your priorities after you’ve set them. People overwork, set time to watch television and surf the Internet, but many people don’t set time to do the things that they say are important to them; for example; exercise, interacting with family or just spending time clearing your mind and doing something you enjoy. In one of my previous articles, “Wellness After 30: Getting The Most Out of Later Life”, I talked about the importance of taking a closer look at how you spend your time on an average day; writing down your daily activities to find opportunities to include things you might not have known existed.

In order to free up some of the time you spend watching television, you may want to record the TV shows you enjoy watching, and when you play them back, fast forward through the commercials. You will gain 12 minutes of personal time for every hour of TV you watch. Don’t be forced to follow programming schedules. Watch fewer shows but take the time to enjoy the ones you do see. Try limiting your time surfing the internet to one hour per day. Analyze the total number of hours you are spending at work versus how productive you really are on an average day.

Time is finite: 60 minutes in an hour, 24 hours in a day and 7 days a week. You can’t save it, but you can waste it. The amount of time we have does not matter, but rather the way we use it. Life can change in an instant so it’s important to make the most of what we have. Make time for what’s important to you: connecting with others, working in a career you’re passionate about, being proactive about your health by being physically active. Here are five steps you can take right now to get started.

1. Establish priorities that are truly important to you.

If your life is already full of things to do and you have no more time to add anything else, which is the case for most people. What do you do? Well you definitely don’t want to add anything to an already full plate. You must take some things away in order to free up time.

If I examined your life right now, would I be able to see what’s really important to you? Ask yourself what’s working, what’s not working and what could be better.

2. Re-evaluate your priorities using your time the way you really want.

As a mom, I have an ongoing struggle to get my children to realize that as they get older I need them to be accountable for the things that are within their capacity to handle, so that I can have more time for what I want to do. I have easily done this in every other aspect of my life, but this particular area is not so easy. I work consistently to get to what I really want in this area of my life everyday.

Take an inventory of your life; Are there areas of your life that need your attention, energy and resources? Look at the people that are in your life and assess why they are there. Do they fuel you or drain you?

3. Make time for yourself.

Make yourself number one as a priority. Spend your time and energy on things that bring you joy and make decisions based on what you want instead of what others want.

Practice excellent self-care. Focus on yourself in order to strengthen your balance, well-being and quality of life.

4. Set boundaries around your life.

Say “no” with respect when you already have a full plate. Don’t let your guilt talk you into saying yes. Explain to others that in order to honor your priorities you cannot add anything else right now. You can reschedule or just decide that it does not contribute to your overall priorities.

Learn your limits. We don’t say “no” frequently enough and we end up paying a price. For example, your best friend asks you to go to the mall today, your son has soccer practice, your daughter has violin lessons and your spouse/significant other is working late. What do you do? You can tell your best friend that you have to reschedule the mall trip for another day in order to honor your priorities.

5. Time is a gift.

If you found out today that you had 30 days left to live. What would become important to you? You shouldn’t wait for a message like that to live your life to the fullest. Spend your precious time right now being alive and enjoying your life fulfilling your purpose on this earth everyday.

Now that you’ve freed up some time, create an action plan and set goals to achieve what you say is important to you at this very moment.

The Power of Thought

Look around you. Perhaps you see a chair. This chair is real and exists in time and space. Yet before it came into being, it first existed as a thought. In fact, everything in the room existed as a thought at some point in someone’s mind. Who you are today and the reality you have created are a result of your thoughts – your thoughts about what is possible and what’s not. These thoughts are influenced by your spirituality your purpose – who you see yourself being, and your beliefs and values.

It is said that a person has over 60,000 thoughts every day. That’s over forty thoughts a minute! Yet, of the 60,000 thoughts you have today, ninety percent of these are the same as the 60,000 you had yesterday and the day before, leaving little room for new thoughts. No wonder life can seem tedious at times. Unless you start to think differently, you are destined to continue to create and repeat the same old reality every day. Is it not time to change your thoughts, live your dreams and let reality catch up?

Most of our thoughts and actions are habits, and we go through the same motions each day, with little change in our behaviors or outlook. What would happen if you challenged these habits or customs? If you were to step out of your comfort zone and explore new ideas or new ways of doing things? Would your life not change as a result?

Often our thoughts are about not measuring up, being incapable or inadequate, avoiding failure or beating ourselves up because we did not say or do the right thing. Just as thought preceded the creation of the chair, your thoughts precede the reality that you create for yourself.

The future lies ahead of you, determined by your current thoughts. These are the only thoughts over which you have any control. What thoughts will you choose for yourself that will be the cause of a different future for you?

Thought is a form of energy. Does this energy propel you forward or hold you back? You have a choice about the thoughts you think. How many times in the past have you chosen to disregard your positive thoughts and focus on your negative thoughts? At this moment, if you were to be at cause and to focus on your positive thoughts while discounting your negative thoughts, how would your life change?

“You become what you think about.”
Earl Nightingale

To realize your dreams, pay attention to what is happening around you. Be curious. Notice how your thoughts about yourself, your thoughts about others and your thoughts about what others may be thinking of you influence what you are able to achieve. Start to think, see and experience things, people, places and events in new ways. Recognize what happens when you begin to think differently about yourself and what you are capable of achieving.

How to Get Exactly What You Want

J. Paul Getty was quoted for his formula for success: “Rise early, work hard, strike oil.” I’m a huge supporter of the practice of rising early (and if you’re not, you probably should be). But regardless of when you wake up, the other two actions in this formula are “work hard,” and “strike oil.”

When I first ran across this quote ten years ago, I had to laugh, because it looked like Getty was saying you have to work hard and hope to get lucky. But a decade later, I can see the more relevant meaning, and I’m about to share with you why Getty’s concept, perhaps more than anything else you might ever read, could be what gets you everything you want for the rest of your life.

It’s all about your expectations
In short, it all comes down to your personal expectation as to whether or not you’re going to strike oil. That’s it. That’s where it all starts. I can say this because that’s how reality works – you’re not going to get anything if you don’t work hard to achieve it. But you’re not going to work hard in the first place unless you have a strong enough expectation that you’ll be successful (or at least be successful at learning from the experience).

This is just how life works. Your motivation to take action, and to follow through until the job is done, is directly proportional to your belief that you will succeed. (Side note: In some cases, the belief in success isn’t even necessary – instead, you might be motivated by the fact your action will serve a higher cause, such as a ‘failed’ protest sparking a larger public awareness down the road).

If you break this concept down to the simplest parts, what you have is this: When you believe strongly enough that you will succeed at something, success is practically guaranteed – not because your belief creates the result, but because you don’t give up taking action on a massive level until you get what you want.

When you believe that success is inevitable, you are able to put aside the idea that “failure,” in the conventional sense, is a bad thing. Instead, it’s just a specific attempt that you can learn from. Another life lesson to be accepted and consumed, not feared.

When you believe that success is going to be the end result of you never giving up, then you are going to attack your objective with a greater energy, a greater passion, a greater work ethic. You’re going to be excited about what you’re doing, because you know that it matters. You know that whatever it is you’re doing, it’s adding value that will eventually translate into the result you want.

That unwavering belief lets you focus your thoughts on questions like “How can I … ?” rather than “Why can’t I … ?” The perspective of certainty gives you the ability to see obstacles as not these things that stand in your way, but instead as challenges that fuel your growth.

I’ve paid my dues
I experienced this myself as a ten year old kid in Brooklyn, New York. A horrible turn of events led to my mother getting murdered, my father going to prison for life, and me ending up all but homeless until I was taken in by a relative who was both an alcoholic and a drug user.

Years later, after I escaped the constant surroundings of drugs and violence, people remarked to me how surprised they were that I had avoided getting involved in drugs, alcohol, or any of the gang activity that was so pervasive during those years. Rather than any of that, I pretty much was a straight-A student who stayed out of (too much) trouble.

I always found it a bit humorous that while some people believed it was a solid foundation of strength that kept me on the straight and narrow, the thing that really kept me safe was that I didn’t really accept the idea that I could get involved in any of those things in the first place. I just didn’t know any better – I thought I was supposed to avoid them!

I just didn’t see it as possible or reasonable for me, so I never thought about it. Those things were problems “other people” got involved in, but not me. In fact, I viewed the daily challenges I faced as tests that were there to make me stronger, so one day my life could make some kind of difference. And poof – that’s exactly what happened. :

The point of all this is that all of my actions were driven by a firm belief that I would succeed eventually. That I would get through it all and come out okay on the other side. That I would strike oil. And it’s no different than the mindset you have to adopt to make any of your goals/dreams/objectives a reality.

There’s an old saying, “What would you attempt if you knew you could not fail?” While it sounds good on the surface (and it is, don’t get me wrong), it’s not perfect. Sure you could say what you would attempt if you knew you couldn’t fail, but that doesn’t help you when your brain is shouting, “Hey dummy, you’re probably going to fail, don’t you realize that?” The original question is a good start, but it needs to be taken a step further.

Instead of wishful thinking about what “could” happen, I’ve found a better question is more along the lines of “What will you attempt knowing that you will ultimately succeed, despite all the ‘failures’ that are sure to come along the way?”

Because, face it, life is going to throw some pretty rough stuff over to you. You’re going to have a lot more “go wrong” than you’d ever hoped for. But striking oil is about drilling deeper, even if you hit a few rocks along the way. In fact, the expectation is that you have to do a lot of drilling before you tap into that pocket of oil.

So let’s talk about setting expectations. An expectation, in it’s most literal sense, is a certainty that a specific result will occur.

If you’ve got a major goal that want to achieve, you need to have at least five things straightened out before you can really attack it full force.

#1 – You have to have the expectation that you, specifically you, can achieve this goal.

This one is a biggie. People typically have a lot easier time believing something is “possible” than believing it’s “possible for them.” They don’t fully believe that they will be capable of achieving a goal because they are missing something – the time, the talent, the resources, whatever. They have an unwritten expectation that they will not be one of the people who “has what it takes.”

That’s a load of garbage. If you believe that, even just a little bit, then it’s going to seriously damage your ability to take action. You’re never going to give 100% and stick with it until the job is done. If this is you, you need to fix this first. (Stay tuned for an upcoming article on how to do just that. I’ll link to it here when it’s ready).

#2 – You have to have the expectation that you will close the resource gap, no matter how wide it is.

This one is also a biggie. It’s easy to look at a large goal and feel like the distance between it and you is too wide. After all, how can you compete with the biggest successes in the world, who are already established? You can find out how by studying the people who do it every day, like skinny, broke college kid Michael Dell who took on IBM and Hewlett-Packard (and is still winning). If you’re reading this years from now, a hundred other stories just like his will have come and gone.

You have to, have to, have to believe any resource gap can be closed. A lack of time, money, manpower, connections … it all doesn’t matter, because there’s a number of creative solutions out there that you’re going to come up with to overcome all that.

If you don’t believe the resource gap can be closed, it won’t, because you won’t take full-out action to make it happen. But if you have the expectation that it will eventually be resolved, guess what’s going to happen. (Again, stay tuned for an upcoming article on how to do just that. I’ll link to it here when it’s ready).

#3 – You have to have the expectation that you will find a solution to every problem that will inevitably come your way. Every one.

You can’t guarantee a problem-free life. But you can guarantee that you see a ‘problem’ as an opportunity, so rather than being drained by the challenge, you are energized. Chew on this and decide how you’re going to make this shift in thinking. (In the meantime, bookmark this post and check back later to find a link to an upcoming article on how to do this.)

#4 – You have to have the expectation that every action you take matters. Every damn one.

This is critical. When you think taking action won’t matter in the long run, you simply won’t do it. But when you recognize that action accumulates – that the pyramids are built brick by brick, and every one matters, you’ll be willing to take action even when you don’t feel like it and your heart’s not in it.

Remember, everything you matters. If you don’t think it does, then you need to make that shift as well. Stay tuned for an article on that.

#5 – You have to believe that you can accelerate the process of getting to your objective.

This one’s my favorite. As you improve the discipline of following through and taking action on a consistent basis, you’ll want to find new forms of leverage to make the journey to completion a lot shorter. This is what “Million Dollar Leverage” is all about.

By holding onto the firm expectation that you can find ways of leveraging all your resources, you’ll be subconsciously looking for ways to make that happen, and as a result you’ll find a lot more of them. And that will get you to your goal faster. Much faster.

So, I hope I’ve sold you on the power of expectation to get what you want – to strike oil, whatever that means to you. If not, then read this article again and again until it sinks in. And then put your expectations to the test and get them correctly aligned. It’s a bit of work, but if you do it you’ll start seeing better results than you’ve ever seen before in a lot less time than you might imagine (unless your expectation is to see results right away :).

So get a pen an paper and get your expectations put in writing so you can drill them into your brain and use them to your advantage. Do it now – you’ll thank yourself for it.

What is Important in Life?

When we are healthy, we seldom think about what it feels like to be sick. But when we are really and truly sick, all we can think about is being healthy again.

No matter how much wealth we manage to accumulate in this world, it is virtually useless without good health. This is tied closely to the knowledge of our own mortality. Deep down, we all know that we only have a handful of decades on Earth and then it’s over.

In light of that, what becomes important then? That is indeed an interesting question. What is important cannot be money, because we can’t take it with us when we die. What is important can’t be our possessions because, once again, they are not going with us. Having money and possessions is very temporary. Those things cease to matter to us when we die.

Some turn to their relationships when they realize this. They feel that family and friends must be the most important thing then. Yet, we will lose contact with family and friends when we pass away too.

Some people die and then come back. They call this the near-death experience. Many of those people talk about what they saw in the state of death. They also talk about how they feel which is almost universally wonderful. There are a few that report going to a very bad place, but the majority feel good. They are free from the pain and suffering of their mortal bodies.

In the near-death experience, many talk about the life review process, where they see their entire lives displayed before them. The good things they do and the bad are right there. In addition they see how their actions and words affected others too. Apparently it can be quite painful to recognize how much we hurt others and caused others pain.

They also get to see the good things they did. I remember one woman who went through the life review process said that the most significant act in her entire life occurred when she was a little girl. She said that the most important action out of her entire life was holding a little flower in her hand and giving it unconditional love. That was it, out of her entire life that was deemed the most significant thing she ever did.

In light of that, we can conclude that what is important is not who we were but how well we treated others in this life. Therefore, when we contemplate our lives and set our goals, maybe it would be a good idea if we thought about others first.

Life is not temporary, but life on Earth is temporary. How are we going to face all those people who are watching what we do, when it is all over? Hopefully, we will have done things that we can be joyous about.

What Is Your Purpose?

Are you living a purposeful life? One of the main factors involved in people who are feeling depressed and unhappy is the simple fact that they feel their lives lack meaning and direction. Fortunately, it is simple to give your life meaning and direction. All you need to do is find a purpose for your life.

Even if you aren’t depressed and unhappy, defining your purpose can help you. Knowing who you are and what you want out of life can help you achieve more and be more. It can also help you make better decisions each day.

Finding your purpose may take some time and thought because what you are doing is very important and very meaningful. You are going to create your personal mission statement. Nothing is more important than that mission statement because ultimately it will define what you do and who you are. Try to set aside several hours to focus your energy on this task. If you don’t have a large block of time then you can set aside smaller time periods and work through these five steps one at a time.

Step One: Look Back

Think about your past especially the high points and successes. Make a list of all your successes and all the points of pride and accomplishment. Spend time simply thinking about your childhood, school years, and other phases of your life so you can make a list that is as complete as possible. Do you spot any trends among these accomplishments and successes?

Step Two: Look Inside

Make a list of positive words or attributes that people use to describe you such as hard working, creative, passionate, or determined. Then make a list of words or attributes you use to describe yourself. What are your gifts and talents? Make sure to list the ones that you don’t currently use as well as those you currently develop and utilize. After reviewing and comparing these lists make a list of five or six core values that are your top priorities.

Step Three: Look At Your Dreams

Now take the time to dream a little. If time and money were no object how could you contribute to the world, your family, your career field, your friends, and your community? What are your passions? What moves you, excites you, or angers you?

Step Four: Look Ahead

Review your notes from Steps One, Two and Three and identify your top goals and priorities. Make a list of these and then number them in order of importance.

Step Five: Look For Your Mission

Your mission statement can have three levels. The top level should be a simple one-sentence action statement that becomes your personal mission or vision. Simply complete this sentence: My mission is to …

For example, “My personal mission or vision is to nurture, educate, and stimulate enlightenment for human development”.

The second level can be your professional mission statement. Some people may decide that they don’t need a separate professional mission statement. I don’t because as a teacher and writer I feel my professional mission is the same as my personal mission as a mother, wife, friend, and community activist.

The third level is actually a longer and more detailed description of your mission or vision.

For example, “I chose the action verbs nurture, educate, and stimulate because I believe
at heart that I am a nurturer. That is why I write, that is why I garden, that is why I teach, and that is why my family is so important to me. I love taking the germ of an idea, a tiny seed or an eager mind and helping them grow and reach for new possibilities. I think it is no great stretch for a nurturer to also be an educator. I am a lifelong student. Whenever I learn something new about the world or the people, animals or plants that inhabit it I cannot wait to share the knowledge either through my writing or a classroom and hope that knowledge will help others learn and grow as well. Last, but perhaps most important, growth does not have to be a passive, boring experience. It can be active and fun. I believe true growth and learning only occur when the experience is stimulating. I chose enlightenment because I cannot imagine a greater gift to the world or to the individual than to be enlightened. I know every article and story I’ve written in my lifetime did not enlighten, but in recent years I have been working to reach that goal. It does not have to be a grand enlightenment, for often small shafts of light can have a profound influence on another and that is what I hope to provide. And, finally, human development, because I cannot imagine a more impact-filled area than human development. I am a strong believer in the fact that we should spend our lives in continuous development and we should each do our part to help others develop, too. If we do not continue to develop and grow as an individual, and as a society, and as a world, then we cannot hope to survive let alone thrive”.

Creating my own personal mission statement did change my life. It helped me to change careers, start my own business, and make important decisions about my professional life and personal life. Having a mission statement and giving myself a vision for my future has helped me give my life focus and purpose which has greatly added to my personal happiness. Why don’t you give it a try?

Making Life Easier, With NLP Chunking

You know, in psychology there is a rule, especially within the NLP circles that I work in and the NLP literature that I read, it is quite a famous rule; 7 plus or minus 2 this is the notion that the conscious mind can only keep track of between 5 and 9 discrete pieces of information at one time. Your unconscious can literally keep track of billions and billions of things at the same time aparently (clever thing that it is!), while your conscious mind is more one step at a time and it has a fairly narrow focus. Whatever the truth of this, it is a useful way to experience your own thinking.

Here are a couple of things that you can do to test the extent of your conscious mind: Without writing them down, blurt out now, straight away without thought;

– As many brands of cars as you can.

– As many film titles as you can.

– As many pop groups as you can.

I often ask people these questions on our NLP trainings. Many people run out of steam when they get to ten, usuallly because of the 7+-2 rule. The bottom line is, when the conscious mind is presented with more than 9 pieces of information, it gets overloaded. So before you send me a very clever email telling me off for pointing out the limits of the conscious mind, would you like to know how you can use this to your advantage? Of course you would.

When you bear the 7+-2 rule in mind, you can start to organise things so that you work with your conscious mind, playing to its strengths. For instance, if you have a to-do list.

Many people that I have encountered have a daily to-do list with 20 or more items on it. This is a recipe for total overwhelm (at which point they often resort to looking for the easiest or funnest thing on the list to do.) The following ideas can help you get a handle on your to-do list really fast, especially if that list has things that are important for your goals and achievements and sense of well-being.

Firstly, scan through the list, looking for items that can be grouped together into categories.

For example, here is a load of the stuff on my list for this week:

Write latest ezine article.

Bank cheques.

Finish writing chapter for new book

Prepare for client therapy sessions.

Finish project on public speaking.

Finish marketing material for new courses.

FInish listening to current educational Audio set.

Read through solicitors material regarding other business project.

Write up script for new audio title.

Send out follow-up letters for last weeks clients.

Prepare for photo shoot for new Bio.

Write up blurb for my new Audio release.

Write new web-page copy.

Review new CD covers

Meet PR people

Do proposal for new book for Publishers.

Read e-book

New course blurb

Meet with prospective business artner for new project.

Clear inbox.

Have a life. Have fun……

The first thing on the list is ‘Write ezine’ for me, my ezine “Adam Up” is one of my products, so I write ‘Product’ beside it. Next is ‘Bank Cheques’ that’s part of our cashflow system, so I write ‘Systems’ beside it. Pretty soon, every item on my list is in a category:

Write Adam Up: Products

Bank cheques: Systems

Finish writing chapter for new book: Products

Prepare for client therapy sessions: People

Finish project on public speaking: Personal

Finish marketing material for new courses: Training

Finish listening to current educational Audio set: Personal

Read through solicitors material regarding other business project: Projects

Write up script for new audio title: Products.

Send out follow-up letters for last weeks clients: Systems.

Prepare for photo shoot for new Bio: Marketing.

Write up blurb for my new Audio release: Marketing.

Write new web-page copy: Marketing.

Review new CD covers: Systems

Meet PR people: People.

Do proposal for new book for Publishers: People.

Read e-book: Personal.

New course blurb: Marketing.

Meet with prospective business artner for new project: People.

Clear inbox: Personal.

Have a life. Have fun: Personal.

This is better! I have now gone from a list of 20 or so items (instant overwhelm) to a list of 6 categories which is well within even my 7+-2 limit.

– Products

– Systems

– Training

– Marketing

– People

– Personal

This is what we refer to as chunking in the NLP field, and is one of the most effective ways of dealing with any large or complex set of tasks (or set of anything else). You may say “Great, but I’ve got 200 things on my to-do list”. It doesn’t matter the same principles apply. If you go through your to-do list or your goals lists; just get it whittled down from 200 items to 20 categories, that is better, it is getting it more manageable go through the 20 categories and see where they group together. Group together goals for your own development; being a non-smoker, growing in confidence, creating wealth, reducing weight etc. Within NLP, the key is to have no more than 9 categories at each level this way your conscious mind can keep track of it.

It is a simple thing that we do often anyway, NLP just heightened my awareness of it. I now do it in an NLP way.

Secondly, start to manage your to-do list by the high-level categories: You can use this in all sorts of areas to make things more manageable, for example:

– To-do lists.

– Goals you are working toward.

– The filing system on your computer.

– Your filing cabinet.

– Any project you’re doing.

One of the things this allows you to do is notice very quickly if there’s a specific area where you have not been taking much action lately very useful for helping focus on what needs attention.